My Concept of Home: I lost it somewhere
I was only 21 when I moved away from the Philippines, I was this young when I decided to turn my life upside down. When I made an effort to cope up with a completely different culture from what I used to. I’d cry myself to sleep and hope that one day things will get better and there is no need to run back home after the decision I have made.
Why didn’t I come home or even talk to my family that I was homesick?
I felt like I will be failing myself if I do it, so I decided to wipe my tears and face the new world in front of me. Three months later, as the cold and gloomy winter of Denmark is about to come to an end, I started to see a light from the situation I was in. I managed to make friends, I began to decipher the language that was foreign to me. Just like every person, I started to feel the breeze of the Spring in the air. Finally, I’m adjusting to the new place which will be my home for the next two years.
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As my time in Denmark was about to end, I knew I didn’t want to go back to the Philippines. I want something new, somewhere fresh, something new to me. I want a challenge. Only a few weeks before my time was up, I booked a one-way ticket to Vietnam to see what it is like to be a backpacker or world traveller – that was the plan.
Eventually, the plan changed. I did travel to different countries, I even lived in a couple of places like Vietnam and Israel. Day by day, I noticed that the concept of home has changed not only in the way I use the word but mostly the way I see the meaning of home.
“Where is home?” A stranger asked.
“Oh, my hostel is just down the road.” Will be my instant answer – always.
The immediate meaning of home to me is now where I will sleep tonight and not where I grew up or my nationality anymore. If I will do a quick check-up in my memory, I can now see the Philippines as a foggy name from the past. It has only been four years since I left, but it feels like it’s been forever.
Nowadays, we all know how easy and cheap it is to hop on a flight, fall asleep, and wake up on the other side of the world. Where we can almost be anyone, we can start a new life. Nowadays, more and more people are finding this opportunity to start over, start something fresh or sometimes simply find an adventure.
Travellers will talk about how travelling changed them or what they learnt from it, but for me, travelling taught me how to change the concept of home. Today, I already made a handful of friends from all over the world, I have travelled a few countries, I have tasted freedom right in every flights, buses and train rides I have taken. Now, know I can go anywhere. But that is not really I want to do, my life goal has changed just like how the road and travelling moulded me to a new person.
I now live in Vietnam, Ho Chi Minh City to be exact. I live in a cheap apartment, I live somehow like a local, I even have a hamster of my own who I fell in love so deeply! My life is fun and comfortable compared to the past four years. Even though, I knew I still need to do something, probably a lot more things. But for now, there is one I really want to have – a home.
I know how easy it is to go somewhere else, make new friends, be crazy and wild, start a new home. But now, since I have lost or at least have forgotten the sense of home, this is what I want to do. I want to find a home and bring back its concept in my mind.
A place where I am not only having fun or living like a local or have a place of my own. I want a place where I will spend every waking day without staring at my the ceiling of my room and hoping I’m somewhere else.
I have many dreams you see, I want to achieve those one by one, but for now, I want a home.